Real vampires spell vampire with a y

Republican vampire Jonathon Sharkey has issued a challenge to Robert Pattinson.

I hope you will print this response to The Hollywood Reporter’s story that Twilight Vampyre Wannabe Robert Pattinson is related to Vlad Tepes Dracula.

Personally if that boy thinks he’s from Vlad’s bloodline, then let him prove it, in the way Vlad would… On a field of battle! As the US Secret Service will attest, I am Vlad to the bone. Unlike Pattinson, I am a warrior and a true Vampyre.

If he truly wants to prove his Vlad heritage, then I challenge him to face me on a field of battle. Let see which one of us is “VLAD TO THE BONE!” Not a Hollywood pretty boy!

Do Svidaniya,
Nel Sangue,
Jonathon “The Impaler” Sharkey (R)
Presidential Candidate

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